I make Milk, What's your Super Power?

It's old news that Facebook is against breastfeeding. They shut down group after group of breastfeeding fans. They delete people's private breastfeeding photos. Meanwhile, dirty pictures proliferate on the site. It always annoys me, but most recently they shut down The Leaky Boob, and that is a REALLY good site.

I would LOVE to boycott Facebook, but with friends and family all over the world, that just isn't going to happen.

I had posted a plan here to flood Facebook with real obscenity reports, but The Leaky Boob and other Facebook BF Advocates think that is not the right approach, so since it's not my own battle, and I was only trying to help them win their battles, fine. Don't go reporting stuff like nasty porn because I told you to. This was never about telling you to report every cleavage shot out there, just the really truly nasty stuff that would be sold in magazines that have to be wrapped in black plastic. Evidently, The Leaders don't think even that stuff should get reported. Okie dokie.

The two people who did report high amounts of obscenity reports will be getting aliens from me in the mail as soon as I have time to make more.

For some humor, here are some dirty pictures from my personal collection:

Phallic Rock on Molokai

Yes, These Mynah Birds are doing the deed. I thought they were fighting.

Happy Birthday Wyatt! Our "Homebirth in a Hospital" Story.

In honor of my baby boy's First Birthday, here is his birth story. My 2nd VBAC, but my first all natural birth.  It was also the first time that labor started BEFORE my membranes ruptured, but I still let them rupture on their own.

I started having signs of prelabor on Tuesday, the 13th.  Around 3am on the 15th, contractions became more regular but still 15-20 minutes apart. They stayed rather irregular all day, getting closer and closer together.  Occasionally, I would sit down at the computer and time them using www.ContractionMaster.com.  I wondered if this was it, but kept telling myself this was only pre-labor, and might go on for a week or more.

Just before Matthew got home, I decided Wyatt was going to arrive some time this weekend, maybe even tonight.  I called Tabetha to make sure she could watch the kids, but she was about to leave for a football game. No big deal, it wouldn't be tonight anyway. She would be free all weekend.

When Matthew got home from work I told him we had to get ready to go, just in case, I took another chance to time the contractions they were down to 5 minutes apart.   I hadn't told Matthew about the regular contractions and spacing yet. He just thought it was another day of me trying to get him to do stuff-like put the 3rd carseat in the car. Finally I told him that I thought I was at the point where normal people go to the hospital. 

We called the hospital to see what spacing they like people to come in at. They said 3-5 minutes apart.  Mine were 5 minutes apart then. Still thinking we had plenty of time, and that it might not even be real labor for sure, we slowly finished getting ready to go.  Luckily our other neighbors could keep the kids until Tabetha got home.When we got in the car, Matthew took over the timing of contractions, with me just saying "now" to start and stop.  I told him I didn't want to know what the timing was.  I hadn't wanted to start using labor props too early, but finally turned on the iPod to Bellaruth Naparstek's "Music for Childbirth" as we pulled out of the driveway. 

I could tell the contractions were getting more serious when I was squirming all over the backseat of the car, and "now" was the only thing I could say.  When we arrived at the hospital, Matthew helped me out of the car at the door before he went to park. I asked him how far apart the contractions were and he said 2-3 minutes, lasting 2 minutes.  I went inside to get checked out. I had told Matthew we were only staying if I was over 7cm dilated. 

As we walked down the hallway, I heard a nurse counting like a drill sergeant for someone else's pushes. No way that would be me. I went into kill the nurse mode, defensive of my right to labor as I wanted. 

When we got to the room, the nurse started handing me a gown, said they'd monitor me on my back in bed for an hour, and start an IV.  I gave Matthew a look and he took care of it. Matthew told her to go read my birth plan and not come back until she had!!  She never came back. She sent another nurse who turned out to be the best nurse I could have hoped for. Danielle honored my entire birthplan, with the help of Dr. McCarty. When Danielle checked my cervix, I was already 8 centimeters and fully effaced!  Thank you to Huggies.com's Birthplan creator for making it SO EASY to make a birth plan!  I tried other Birth Plan creator websites, but liked theirs the best. Getting it signed off on by my midwife, early in the third trimester, and put into my record was key!

With a saline lock in place of an IV, I was free to move around as needed. I squatted next to the bed, leaned over the bed and did everything I could to stay OUT of the bed.  I knew getting on my back would stall things and make labor harder. Ideally, I wanted to give birth squatting, since it opens the pelvis 4 cm more than the "lithotomy position" lying on your back.  It wasn't up to me though, and luckily Dr. McCarty didn't force me into any unnatural position. I let nature tell me how to move and just listened to my body - and my iPod.

Most of the time, Danielle and Dr. McCarty weren't even in the room. It was just Matthew and me.  Every now and then, they would come in and I'd hold still as long as I could for them to monitor the baby with the doppler. In the 3 hours of hospital labor, they only monitored a few times, totally honoring my birth plan!

Eventually, the contractions got worse. I told Matthew that I couldn't relax anymore, and he knew I needed him. We found a position that worked, with me on my hands and knees on the bed, him squatting at the foot of the bed, and me sort of hugging his arms and pushing my head into his armpit. It was the closest possible thing to a hug.

 On one contraction I pushed and my water broke all over the place. I knew he needed to go tell the doc, but I didn't want him to leave my hug. They knew things would move fast once my water broke. Around this time, my squirming ripped out my saline lock. I was now laboring in a swamp of blood and amniotic fluid.  

Since my head was at the foot of the bed, they needed me to turn so the doctor could actually catch the baby.  I managed to turn 90 degrees between contractions, so I could still hug Matthew on one side of the bed and Dr. McCarty could catch the baby on the other side.  After a few pushes, still on my elbows and knees, with Matthew encouraging me in a soft voice, Wyatt was born. The cord had been wrapped around his neck 2 times, but the doctor slipped them off as he came out, and everything was fine.

Had I been laboring on my back or if labor had stalled due to interventions, those wraps of the cord could have had lasting complications for Wyatt, and all of us. 

Oh, and by the way, when we left the hospital (another story in itself), I carried Wyatt from the room to the door in my sling, NOT in a car seat. The nurses went to the car with us to make sure he was buckled safely into a convertible car seat. So, for all of you babywearers wanting to avoid a bucket car seat, it IS possible to leave a hospital without one. 

Doctors and other Dummies.

This post isn't just about barefoot running though. It's about a connection I drew tonight, while researching for info on barefoot running shoes. Yes, that's an oxymoron. Keep reading. Anyway, it occurred to me as I was reading blog posts and message board threads about barefooting, that barefooters are as awed by this Lack of a NEED for technology as homebirthers and natural birthing moms are.

Would you put your baby in a duffel bag?

***edited to add: My live traffic feed says quite a few people from Europe are reading this. I'm really curious how you  are finding me! Please quench my curiosity by commenting!!***


I was already annoyed and planning to blog at some point about the idiocy of the CPSC's warning about baby slings.  Now that they have named and forced a recall of the one that killed 3 babies in 2009, I'm even more annoyed. 

At first, when it was just a general warning, I thought if anything, slings should just be added to the list of SIDS dangers, like stuffed animals and blankets in the crib. 14 deaths in 20 years, 12 of which were preemies and/or had respiratory issues anyway. Doesn't everyone know 8lbs is the minimum for sling riding?  I wondered how a parent could be so clueless that they wouldn't notice a baby not breathing. When I'm wearing my itty bitty babies in my DreamSlings or other slings, you can feel the movement of the breathing because they are so close to you, and if you can't just feel it with your belly, you can put your hand on the outside of the sling and feel the breathing. Most babywearers that I know do it frequently, just like we feel our bellies while we are pregnant.

To me it's like publishing a general warning about carseats rated for 20-65 lbs because a two 16 pound babies didn't make it through wrecks in 4 years. Those babies shouldn't have been in those seats in the first place. Failure to follow weight guidelines and pay attention to less than 1 kid/year does not warrant the amount of news coverage and bad press that this has gotten!


So then, yesterday a facebook friend posted about the recall of the Infantino SlingRider. I went to see what it is, and it's the big fluffy, funky sling sold at Wal-mart, I'm not surprised which one is recalled. Have you ever seen one of those used? I never once saw a person using it correctly. I saw a dad wearing a brand-new-from-the-hospital baby in one one time, and it was hanging so low it actually flapped against his thighs as he walked.

I noticed that even in the pictures on the package, the sling is worn more like a duffel bag than how real pouch and ring slings are worn. This thing even has a 3 point seatbelt to keep the baby from falling out. A REAL sling doesn't need a seatbelt because they baby is held CLOSE to the wearer, and a properly fitted or adjusted sling isn't going to let the baby fall out. WOULD YOU PUT YOUR BABY IN YOUR GYM BAG? That's what this Infantino Slingrider is. An open top duffel bag with a seatbelt.
 
A properly fitted pouch sling (like the picture on the left) has the baby's  butt at about the wearer's belly button, and the baby is worn with his head above the butt. The SlingRider, as advertised (middle pic), has the baby lying down, and the bag they are calling a sling hangs low, more like a duffel bag (last pic).

I HAVE seen "instructional" YouTube videos that show you how to carry a baby in a sling with the head down by your hip, with the feet going up toward the shoulder. SERIOUSLY? Would you walk around with your baby upside down? NO. So why would you plop it into a sling upside down?

It's really going to suck if the Government puts out rules about all slings when this is ONE poorly designed baby killing monster of a "sling." That big fluffy monster is NOTHING like a ring sling or a pouch sling.

If people aren't smart enough to make sure their baby can breath, I don't think a government illustration like this is going to help:

I have to wonder how much money was spent getting an illustrator to make those FANCY drawings above. Wouldn't it have been easier to show a picture like this: 

While we're at it, lets put out a giant scary warning about ALL tricycles because SOME certain ones are tippy, dangerous, poorly designed pieces of crap.

Summary: The Infantino SlingRider isn't really a sling. It should not be called a sling, let alone be allowed to ruin babywearing for responsible parents everywhere.

This comic, compliments of Mama Is, explains this whole problem  much more simply than I do.

RANT! Strollers are NOT necessary! Neither are infant carseats!

Evidently, Sam's Club has banned strollers due to people using the strollers to steal merchandise. On my favorite message board of all times, a woman is urging stroller-loving moms to "unit" (she means "unite") and "campgain" (she means "campaign") for a reversal of this policy.

Here's what I wrote in response, but then deleted because I don't want anyone to get their panties in a wad over me having an opinion (this message board has a LOT of rules to protect pansies).  

I don't understand the problem. Why shop with a stroller anyway? It's not like you can fit much of Sam's merchandise on it, so do you push a stroller AND one of their carts? The carts have 2 spots for kids in them. There aren't many of us that have 3 kids needing to use a stroller at the same time. I have 3 under 4 years, and with a sling can shop just fine. Dragging carseats around isn't necessary if you have a sling or other baby carrier.

If container-izing your monkey of a toddler with a 5-point harness is really what's necessary, then urge Sam's club to install 5-point harnesses on their giant carts. I often wish carts had 5-point harnesses, but instead, I either get the kids to listen or leave the store.

I know I'm in the minority, but I don't see a need for strollers other than jogging strollers for jogging/walking, when for the sake of the workout, you need the kids to keep up. I don't have an infant carseat for Wyatt. I see them as one of those things that our culture has convinced people they need to spend a pretty penny on when it's just not necessary (except maybe for people with multiples).

An old military saying that I love is "Adapt and Overcome."

This particular member generally annoys me, so I would have just ignored her pleas for support but people are actually agreeing with her!!